Lil & Tommy's Ping Pong
by Julianne Q. Grey
Summary: A really funny story about ping pong based off my fifth grade comic, Steph & Tyler's Ping Pong!
1. Chapter 1

Me: Okay, this is my next story! It's in Kimi's point of view, so that's why she's not in here.

Charlie (my little brother): Introducing…

Both: Lil & Tommy's Ping-Pong!

* * *

Chapter 1: The Never-ending Game

"They've been doing this for 508 years!" exclaimed the dark-skinned girl called Susie (In fairy version!). Tommy and Lil's skeletons were in the scene, playing ping-pong, with a cracked ball, a cracked paddle, a broken in half paddle, with an extremely dirty ping-pong table complete with a rotting net. What is this place anyway? Let's go back in time, a long, long time. Five hundred eight years, to be exact.

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"Do we have to sing?" asked one-and-a-half year olds Lil and Tommy.

"Now you have to dance, too, because you asked," said Susie.

"Don't be wrong, it's time for… Lil and Tommy's Ping-Pong!" everyone sang and danced. Tommy's mother had just bought a children's ping-pong set (which turned into an adult's ping-pong set easily), so the Rugrats were having a ping-pong tournament.

"I challenge you to a ping-pong match!" shouted Lil.

"I accept!" replied Tommy.

"_It's going to be a long match,_" thought Susie. Two and a half hours later, Lil won.

"I win! Yay!" exclaimed Lil.

"I want a rematch!" said Tommy. "T.T"

"Sure. Let the match begin," replied Lil. Six hours later, Tommy won.

"Yay. I win," started Tommy. "Tiebreaker?"

"Sure," said Lil. A month later, they were still playing ping-pong.

"Guys, you've been going at it for a month!" exclaimed Susie.

"Don't…care…must…ping…pong," said Lil and Tommy at the same time. Three years later, they were still playing with really high scores.

"Guys, you've been going at it for three years!" yelled Susie.

"Who cares?" asked Lil. So, fifteen years and about 11111111111111100000000009999999933333333337777777333333344444444666666665463 points later, they were s_till_ playing ping-pong.

"You've been doing this for fifteen years!" shouted Susie.

"Whatever," they both responded. Fifty-seven years later, they were all really old and **_still_** playing ping-pong! Yes, **_STILL_**!

"How long have you been doing this again?" asked a really old Susie.

"Fifty-seven years," said Tommy and Lil, both really old.

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So, yeah, I'm dead, and the skeletons of Lil and Tommy have been playing ping-pong since half a thousand years ago. Their spirits, in fact, are still playing ping-pong! Maybe I'll convince the authors of this story to bring them back to life and make them one and a half again…

* * *

Me: Don't worry, Kimi convinced my brother and I already. As a bit of background information, this is based off a comic I wrote in the fifth-grade called "Steph & Tyler's Ping-Pong", which I dug up recently in my mess. 

Charlie: Check back for the next chapter, Championship and review or else Julianne won't update.


	2. Chapter 2

Me: Thanks to my only reviewer, Acosta Perez José Ramiro.

Charlie: Introducing…

* * *

Chapter 2: Championship

"Tommy's awesome, Tommy's great, Tommy wins, there's no debate!" exclaimed my cautious, red-haired, two and a half year old brother, Chuckie.

"I beg to differ," said Susie. Five minutes later, Chuckie was cheering again.

"Tommy's awesome, Tommy's great, Tommy wins, there's no debate! Tommy's uber, Tommy's cool, Tommy muchly dislikes school! Tommy should rule the world: everything, everybody, every single tree! I'm a weirdo, Susie is, too, but Tommy rocks because he rules! Tommy! Tommy is the best, better than you. When he comes out, we all shout 'Woohoo!'" shouted Chuckie.

"I had no idea he was so obsessive," stated Tommy.

"Ready, set, PONG!" yelled Susie.

"Like awesome, like wow, like totally flip me out! I said uh-huh, oh yeah! Our team is number one!" exclaimed Lil.

"Like awesome, like wow," said Tommy. They played for 448 million points.

"I'm gonna win!" exclaimed Tommy.

"Yeah, right. I am!" retorted Lil. In the commentary box, Susie sat next to a sign that read, "At bathroom. Back soon."

"It's a tight match," said Susie. "Who knows who will win? Lil or Tommy? This is Susie Carmichael, signing out."

A really long time later, Lil won.

"I win! I win! I WIN!" shouted Lil.

"I lost to Lillian," cried Tommy. "T.T. Like awesome, like wow, like totally flip me out! I said uh-huh, oh yeah! Our team is number one! T.T."

"Tommy's cool, Tommy's neat, too bad though, he just got beat! Gooooooooooo Lilly!" yelled Phil and Susie, pointing to the absolutely huge trophy engraved, "#1".

"You get a prize, too," began Chuckie, holding up a small trophy engraved, "#2". He added, "You can drink from it."

"Thanks," said Tommy, "It's kind of small, though."

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So, that's how our championship ended; Lil won. Next time, we're playing ping-pong on a camping trip!

* * *

Me: Check back for the next chapter, Camping Trip!

Charlie: Julianne wants two new reviews, or else she won't update!


	3. Chapter 3

Me: I want to once again thank Acosta Perez José Ramiro, and I want to thank myself for reviewing. (Julianne has left the scene to eat a review shaped cookie and give one to Acosta Perez José Ramiro) (Julianne has returned)

Charlie: Introducing… by the way, your cookies smell gross…

Me: That's because I baked the review into it.

* * *

Chapter 3: Camping Trip

Everyone is going camping!

"Kids, please be quiet. You can wait for ping-pong," said Phil and Lil's mom.

"Oh, all right," said all the babies. Five minutes later, in the car they sang, "Donkeys like to munch on ping-balls, ping-balls don't like that at all, ping- pong, ping-pong! Listen to that ping-pong song! Donkeys… ping-pong… PING BALLS DON'T LIKE THAT AT ALL!"

"Lil is good at ping-pong…" sang the girls.

"Tommy's good at ping-pong…" sang the boys.

"They're gonna beat each other… They're gonna kick each other's butts!" sang all the babies.

"Lil is gonna win!" sang the girls.

"Tommy's gonna win!" sang the boys.

"Uber!" they all exclaimed. Then they sang, "Don't be wrong, it's time for… Lil and Tommy's Ping-Pong!"

"Not again!" cried Betty. "T.T"

Later, they were at the campsite. There was a tree nearby that had a sign that read, "Bathroom."

"Ah, the great outdoors!" exclaimed Phil.

"Err… okay," said Tommy, looking at the tree. They went to sleep in tents.

"How come our tent is smaller?" asked Chuckie.

"Dunno," said Tommy. "Maybe cause we're three?"

The next morning, Susie sang, "Wake up to the smell of bacon, toast, all fried!"

"Yum, bacon!" added Lil. Later they all went to play ping-pong.

"Ready, set, PONG!" shouted Susie. Four hours later, Lil won.

"I WIN!" screamed Lil.

"Congrats," said Tommy. Later, on the car they all sang.

"Lil beat Tommy's butt, she's the reigning queen of ping-pong! **PING-PONG!**" they all sang.

"I can't I drove you all out here for ping-pong," said Betty.

* * *

Me: I won't ever, ever, ever update unless I get three new reviews! 

Charlie: You want a total of six! The next chapter's called The Special Edition!

Both: Review or else!


	4. Chapter 4

Me: Thanks to my reviewers kImIcOoLgIrL, Acosta Perez José Ramiro, and Masterd10 for reviewing! (Julianne gives each reviewer a review cookie.) This chapter is shorter because the characters wrote it.

Charlie: Your cookies still smell gross by the way. Introducing…

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Chapter 4: Special Edition

**The Biginning**

By Susie

"Wow!" exlaimd Chuckie. "Awesume! I'm acctualy standing next to Tommy!"

**The Ping-Song**

By Phil

"Munkiys lik to pley ping-pong Lil & Tommy lik to pley, to. Ping-pong, ping-pong; lysen to a munkiy's song." evvryun sed.

"Doo we hav to sing tis evvrytyyme?" aked Tommy.

"Tis tyyme we hav a pardnerd in meusic!" yeld Susie. "We hav to sing it!"

"Ey wuz pactncing tis ad owd syed. Dunt meyke me ruine my niz mumend!" ey sed.

**The Furst Pyng-Pung Jeym**

By Tomey

"Ei whyyn!" whitning mi sed.

"Ei dru tis," mi sed.

"Nyo ei now wat ewe mynd wen ewe sed ewe wer bed et whitning!" yalleded Susie

**The Secnid Ping-Pong Jyem**

By Lil

"Ie whynne!" sez Ie.

**The Spelling/Grammar Corrections**

By Julianne and Charlie

(Susie, The beginning)

"Wow!" exclaimed Chuckie. "Awesome! I'm actually standing next to Tommy!"

(Phil, The ping-song)

"Monkeys like to play ping-pong Lil & Tommy like to play, too. Ping-pong, ping-pong; listen to a monkey's song!" everyone said.

"Do we have to sing this every time?" asked Tommy.

"This time we have a partner in music!" yelled Susie. "We have to sing it!"

"I was practicing this outside. Don't make me ruin my nice moment!" I (Phil) said.

(Tommy, the first ping-pong game)

"I win!" the writing me (Tommy) said.

"I drew this!" I (Tommy) said.

"Now I know what you meant when you said you were bad at writing!" yelled Susie.

(Lil, the secong ping-pong game)

"I win!" I (Lil) said.

* * *

Me: Yeah, I know, really short. The next chapter is The Last Edition: Tommy And The Author Of Pong

Charlie: Julianne wants 4 new reviews, a total of ten!


	5. Chapter 5

Me: Thanks to my reviewers. My cookies burned. I'll hand them out at the end of the chapter.

Charlie: NEVER. BURN. YOUR. COOKIES. AGAIN. THEY SMELL TERRIBLE! Introducing…

* * *

"Chapter 5, The Last Edition: Tommy and The Author Of Pong," said Susie. 

I grinned. Today is the absolutely glorious, fantastic, fabulous, end-of-the-story, PING-PARTY! The author had to do something, so she couldn't be here. Susie ended up taking her place with a speech the author wrote.

"Why me?" asked Tommy.

"I can't believe Susie got us to dress up for the occasion," complained Lil.

"Tommy's awesome, and divine, Tommy once tied knots with twine! Gooooooooooo Tommy!" cheered Chuckie, while thinking, "Oh no! I'm running out of ideas for cheers! Eep!" After that, they sang all the ping songs. Below are all the ping-songs. Ping-Song 1: Don't be wrong it's time for LIL & TOMMY'S PING-PONG! 

**Ping-Song 2: **Donkeys like to munch on ping-balls, ping-balls don't like that at all, ping- pong, ping-pong! Listen to that ping-pong song! Donkeys… ping-pong… PING BALLS DON'T LIKE THAT AT ALL!

**Ping-Song 3:**

Girls: Steph is good at ping-pong…

Boys: Tyler's good at ping-pong…

Both: They're gonna beat each other… They're gonna kick each other's butts!

Girls: Steph is gonna win!

Boys: Tyler's gonna win!

All: UBER!

**Ping-Song 4: **Steph beat Tyler's butt. She's the reigning queen of ping-pong! PING-PONG!

**Ping-Song 5:** Monkeys like to play ping-pong Steph & Tyler like to play, too. Ping-pong, ping-pong; listen to a monkey's song.

Then, Chuckie exclaimed, "Tommy's awesome, Tommy's great, Tommy wins, there's no debate! Tommy's uber, Tommy's cool, Tommy muchly dislikes school! Tommy should rule the world: everything, everybody, every single tree! I'm a weirdo, Susie is, too, but Tommy rocks because he rules! Tommy! Tommy is the best, better than you. When he comes out, we all shout "Woohoo!" Tommy's awesome, and divine; Tommy once tied knots with twine! Gooooo Tommy! Tommy rocks, Tommy rules, Tommy can kick your butt, too! Gooooo Tommy!"

At the ping-party, there was a table of food; apple juice, orange juice, grape juice, a cake shaped like a ping-pong paddle, ice cream, masked chicken, something Chuckie made for Tommy, and pizza.

"Really good idea, Susie," said Tommy.

"I know, you used a ping-pong table _for food_," stated Phil.

"The food is delicious, yum!" yelled Lil.

"Where's Tommy?" asked Chuckie.

"Thank you! Speech time!" exclaimed Susie. There was a podium with pictures of two ping-pong tables, a ping-pong ball between the two tables and a ping-pong paddle. One table read, "Lil" the other read "Tommy's". The ball read, "&" and the paddle read "Ping-Pong". There was a clock on it that read, "12:17 PM". Susie made a really long speech.

"Good day, my friends," began Susie. "We are here today to acknowledge the end of Julianne and Charlie Grey's story, Lil and Tommy's Ping-Pong ™. In the honor of ping, and the honor of pong, I would like to express that the world's best game is ping-pong. To scientifically explain how Lil and Tommy got young in a matter of minutes…"

Tommy fell asleep saying, "Zzzzzzz…."

He woke up in the land of Pong to singing "Binkylumps" that looked strangely like Baby Dil…

"We are the Binkylumps, we suck binkies by the pound, if you wish to leave this land, visit The Author Of Pong. Po-o-ong!" sang the Binkylumps.

"Where on Earth am I?" asked Tommy.

"In the land of Pong," answered one of the Binkylumps.

"Better go visit this 'Author of Pong'," said Tommy.

Back at the speech, at 13:38 (or 1:38 pm), Susie stated, "…and that is exercising author controls to increase or decrease aging, as well as bringing characters to life. Going on to prizes, for winning little things I will later award little things. But now…"

He wandered around a little bit.

"Who the heck are you?" asked Tommy when he finally came upon some creatures.

"I am Lil, the metal girl," said Lil.

"I am Phil, the ping-pong Phil-crow," said Phil.

"I am Chuckie, the cowardly half-lion who can't see you over Phil and Lil," said Chuckie.

"_For once Chuckie's clothing is darker than usual,_" thought Tommy. "_Cool! Boo!_"

It was 15:26 (3:26 PM) and Susie _still_ was making her speech.

"… So, overall I learned how to cook from combined efforts by my mom and Julianne. Thanks to Charlie for serving us! Julianne got her ideas from a comic she wrote in the fifth grade. Songs are…" said Susie. About six minutes later, the group in Pong was a bit more than half way along the ping-pong ball road.

"Hey, you know what time it is?" asked Chuckie. "What should we be doing?"

"Oh, I know!" replied Phil.

"Ping-Song!" exclaimed Lil.

"There's a Ping-Song in my dream world too? What is wrong with me?" yelled Tommy. Five minutes later, they were all singing.

"Oh, we're off to see the Author, the glorious Author of Pong! We're off to see the Author…" everyone sang. Four minutes later, they all were consulting with the author-in-training, Susie, who was filling in for the real Author Of Pong, Julianne.

"I am the Author Of Pong's assistant," said Susie. "State your name and what you want from the author."

"I am Phil, the Phil-crow, and I want a library full of toy cars," stated Phil.

"I am Lil, and I want a new ping-pong set," vocalized Lil.

"I am Chuckie, and I want all the Tommy merchandise," Chuckie proclaimed.

"I am Tommy," announced Tommy. "I want to go back to the ping-party at home."

Everybody except Tommy got his or her wishes with a flick of the Author's pencil. Lil got her ping-pong set, Phil got his library, and Chuckie got his Tommy merchandise!

"Oh yeah," said Susie. "Tommy, in order to get back home, you must play a game of ping-pong with Lil using her new set while saying, 'There's no game like ping-pong,' and win."

"I can do that!" exclaimed Tommy. "Hold on… did you say I have to **_WIN_**?"

"You're on!" screamed Lil. About six hours or so later, Tommy won.

"There's no game like ping-pong, there's no game like ping-pong…" said Tommy. Nine hours (one dream) later from the beginning, Tommy woke up at the end of the long speech with a ping-pong paddle and Chuckie's hand in his mouth, mumbling something about the Author Of Pong…

"(mumble) Author of Pong (mumble) Author (mumble) of (mumble) Pong…" mumbled Tommy.

"Awesome! My actual hand and actual paddle are in Tommy's actual mouth! I'll never wash them again!" yelled Chuckie.

"_Why is a ping-pong paddle and Chuckie's hand in my mouth?_" wondered Tommy.

"Boys are weird," said Susie.

"Really weird," said Lil.

"Especially those two and I," said Phil.

"Tommy's uber, Tommy's neat, Tommy sucked on my hand, sweet!" cheered Chuckie.

"Author (mumble) of (mumble) Pong (mumble) Author (mumble)…" mumbled Tommy.

There was a ping-pong paddle with pictures of two ping-pong tables, a ping-pong ball between the two tables and a ping-pong paddle. One table read, "Lil" the other read "Tommy's". The ball read, "&", the paddle read "Ping-Pong" next to a sign that read…

_**THE END

* * *

**_

Me: (Julianne is in tears) T.T.T. Thanks to Charlie, my beta, Acosta Perez José Ramiro, the only one to review all my chapters, me for reviewing, BehindmyBlueeyes77 for reviewing, and Charlie for reviewing. I give you each a cookie with a design similar to the paddle above, as well as all other previous reviewers.

Charlie: We bade you farewell, for this is truly **_The End_**.

**What's next for Julianne?** I plan on doing a Harry Potter version of this story!


End file.
